Planning for Birth

For many of us, the timing of our baby’s birth and death is uncertain. Will my baby die during pregnancy, during labor and delivery, or after birth?

Some parents may feel the need to make plans for different scenarios. For some families, learning about their options ahead of time can provide a sense of preparation. Others may not feel ready to make these decisions, and that is okay.

Your healthcare team, palliative care team, social worker, or hospital staff can help you understand what to expect and talk through the choices available to you. Creating a birth plan can help you communicate your wishes with your healthcare team and ensure that your values, goals, and hopes for your baby's life are understood.

THINGS TO CONSIDER

• What to Expect and Spending Time With Your Baby

  Ask your care team what you can expect if your baby dies during pregnancy, during labor and delivery, or after birth. You may have the option to hold, bathe, dress, photograph, and spend time with your baby for as long as circumstances allow. You can also ask whether a CuddleCot or another cooling device is available to allow your family additional time together.

• Your Birth Experience

  • What birth options are available to you?

  • Where would you like to give birth?

  • Who would you like present during labor and delivery?

  • What comfort measures or pain management options are important to you?

• Who You Would Like to Be Present

  Consider whether there are family members, siblings, close friends, spiritual or religious leaders, or others you may want to meet or spend time with your baby.

• Time With Your Baby

  • Would you like uninterrupted time with your baby after birth?

  • Who would you like to meet your baby?

  • Are there special traditions, prayers, blessings, or ceremonies you would like included?

  • Would you like photographs, handprints, footprints, or other keepsakes?

• Medical Decisions

  • What interventions, if any, would you like for your baby?

  • What comfort measures are available?

  • Have you discussed your goals of care with your healthcare team?

• Planning Ahead While Leaving Room for Flexibility

  As you continue your pregnancy, many decisions can be made over time as you learn more about your baby's diagnosis and your family's wishes. It is okay if you do not have every answer today. Your plans may evolve throughout your pregnancy, and that is completely normal.

  At the same time, some aspects of planning are easier to coordinate when started early. Depending on your baby's diagnosis and the resources available in your community, certain services, appointments, or referrals may take time to arrange. Beginning these conversations early can help ensure you have access to the care and support you need when the time comes.

  • Ask your healthcare team which referrals or plans should be made sooner rather than later.

  • If you hope to work with a perinatal palliative care team, hospice program, or specialized hospital, ask when those services should be arranged.

  • If your baby may need specialized medical care after birth, planning ahead can help ensure the appropriate providers are available.

  • If travel to another hospital or specialty center may be recommended, discussing logistics early can help reduce stress later in your pregnancy.

  • Remember that a birth plan is a guide—not a contract. It is okay for your wishes to change as your pregnancy progresses or as you receive new information.

  Planning ahead does not mean you have to make every decision today. It simply helps you understand which steps may require additional time so you can prepare at a pace that feels manageable while ensuring the support and resources your family needs are in place.

• Caring For Your Baby’s Remains

  You may have choices regarding burial, cremation, or other arrangements. A hospital social worker, bereavement coordinator, or funeral home can help explain your options, including any requirements that may vary based on where you live.

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