What Can Be Helpful After TFMR
In the Days and Weeks Ahead
There is no right or wrong way to honor your baby. Consider what feels meaningful and supportive for you and your family.
Create memories and keepsakes by naming your baby, saying their name, requesting handprints or footprints, a heartbeat recording, photographs (if available), or saving meaningful items such as ultrasound images, clothing, or other mementos. Even if you are unsure whether you want these keepsakes now, you may choose to have them created or saved in case you would like them in the future. You do not have to look at or engage with them until, or unless, it feels right for you.
Honor your baby in a meaningful way through personal rituals, cultural or spiritual practices, a memorial service, cremation, burial, or another form of remembrance that feels right for you.
Care for yourself physically by prioritizing rest, hydration, nourishment, and gentle movement as you recover.
Accept support from others by asking family and friends for help with meals, childcare, household tasks, errands, or other daily needs.
In the Months Ahead
Grief does not have a timeline. As you move forward, you may find comfort in some of the following:
Stay connected to support by sharing your baby's story with trusted family and friends, joining a pregnancy loss support group, or seeking support from a bereavement professional.
Care for your emotional and physical well-being by prioritizing rest, nourishing your body, engaging in self-care, and setting boundaries with social media when needed.
Find meaningful ways to honor your baby through journaling, creating a memorial space, celebrating important dates, making a donation in their name, or continuing traditions that help you feel connected to them.
Maintain your bond with your baby in ways that feel meaningful to you. Many parents find comfort in speaking their baby's name, displaying keepsakes, writing letters, or finding personal ways to remember their baby.
Prepare for significant dates, such as your due date, anniversaries, or holidays, which may bring up strong emotions. Consider making a plan for how you would like to spend those days and who you would like to have around you.
Hear Stories from our Community
Resources
Online resources
Ending a Wanted Pregnancy
TFMR Psychologist (with an international directory of providers)
Instagram accounts
TFMR Ireland
TFMR Mamas
TFMR Psychologist
TFMR Social Worker
TFMR Support Group
The TFMR Doula
Time to Talk TFMR
LMC Bereavement Support
Facebook groups
TFMR, A Loving Choice
TFMR Dad’s Group
The act of volunteering helped me heal from my own trauma by reshaping the need to bare my story as something that serves others–as well as RTZ HOPE’s mission–with people who might be too afraid to reach out for help.